I take the snot from my nose and smear it all over my face

Two guys have decided to walk to the North Pole in the dead of winter, which sounds crazy enough, but one of them shared his secret for warding off frostbite. Yup, the snot thing. Apparently it freezes and forms a functional (and very fashionable) ice mask.

I’m not an arctic explorer—not much of the outdoorsy type at all, really—but it seems to me, at this point in our evolution, there would be something better. . . but I really don’t know. If there are folks out there who do know about these things, please let me know. I’m curious.

Oh, and one more thing, these two guys, Borge and Mike, are attempting to be the first men to walk 620 miles to the North Pole, unsupported, in the total darkness of Arctic winter. Now, I’m all for challenges, and I think I understand the allure of being the first to do something that’s never been done and all, but when you have to start adding little extra impairments (walking, unsupported, in the dark) to make it still be a first, well, I don’t know, it just doesn’t seem as, uh, firsty.

But, with that in mind, I am hereby announcing my intention to be the first man in New York to blog all night without artificial stimulants. . . while listening to streaming audio. . . and eating a whole box of Mallomars. . . during a rainstorm. . . this year.