what part of this “reality” am I supposed to enjoy?

File under: Worst. Idea. Ever.

Is it possible to take something I care not at all about and turn in into something that disgusts me to my core? Just ask Survivor host Jeff Probst:

Our original idea was simply to have the most ethnically diverse group of people on TV. It wasn’t until we got to casting and started noticing this theme of ethnic pride that you’re alluding to that we started thinking, wow, if culture is still playing such a big part in these people’s lives, that’s our idea. Let’s divide them based on ethnicity. So, yes, I think it’s very natural to assume that certain groups are going to have audience members rooting for them simply because they share ethnicity.

Yes, in case you missed the CBS early morning hoopla, the who-the-hell-cares-what-number-it-is season of Survivor is going to have a cast of mostly recruits who have been selected for their color so that they can be segregated into four racially homogenous teams—oh I’m sorry, “tribes”—so that the races can compete against each other. Why? Because in this time of growing racial strife, Probst, CBS Commandant Les Moonves, and the whole fun-loving bunch of eugenicists over at SSurvivor, thought this would be a really great way to personally enrich themselves through the use of hatred.

Now, I don’t watch much of this show (not because I’m above reality TV; just because I find this show unbelievably dull), but I do know things get kind of heated in the middle of artificially contextualized nowhere, and people tend to say some not very nice things about one another—right into the camera. Won’t it be so very much better when those invectives include racial slurs?

And won’t it be great when those of us who find this so offensive are just labeled as being “too PC,” or something equally as dismissive (you know, like “liberal”)?

Well, to that, I would just like to preemptively say, “Hmm, too PC, or an exploiter of racism—which is worse? Tough call.”

Regular readers should know that I don’t go in much for the scatology or sophomoric calls to violence, but this just has me so fuckin’ appalled that I am thinking we should all have a few too many beers and go on over to Black Rock and accidentally mistake it for one of those modernist urinals they have at those fancy hotels nearby.

Mistaking Moonves and Probst for receptacles for human waste would just be too easy.

(I don’t know if I should spare the show's other producers my wrath, but none of them were mentioned in the few stories I could find about this.)